Narcissistic abuse is often like a malevolent, deceitful ghost that you can’t see coming. For many people, they were confident, happy and thriving at the beginning of the romance or new job. But narcissistic abuse has made them hyper alert, feeling that it’s normal to be constantly walking on eggshells. And their light is dimmed.
I offer sessions to help you recognise narcissistic behaviour and break the abusive cycle. With intuitive insight, channeled guidance and practical steps, I help you return to your authentic sovereign self, with clear boundaries, self worth and confidence to be yourself, shining your light again.
If this is resonating, I am sorry that you have experienced narcissistic abuse which is so often psychological and emotional. Perhaps you recognise yourself in this description:
You don’t even notice how it happened. You are hyper alert to their words and behaviour. You are hoping to avoid their temper tantrums, trying to fix the potential problem before it even becomes a problem, you do everything you can to avoid another angry outburst, to avoid their vitriol and blame, which they fire at you. Their criticism of you cuts you deeply, you feel worthless. And because they say it over and over, you believe that they must be right.
You no longer see your friends or family because the narcissist has isolated you from anyone who might be able to see that you are in an abusive situation. The narcissist insulted your friends and family, making them feel uncomfortable, or perhaps threatened, so they stay away now. And then the narcissist blames you for their absence. If it is your boss, you feel the stressful pressure of trying to do a great job when the narcissist repeatedly moves the goal posts and gaslights you about it. So you doubt your sanity and always feel that you are not good enough.
And there is real fear - that you are trapped, you will lose your job/home/safety/reputation if you don’t do or say what the narcissist tells you to, or behave in the way that they coerce or force you to behave. These are typical examples of being in a narcissistic relationship, whether it’s a romantic partner, a parent or someone who has authority over you, like your boss, client or work colleague.
You are so stressed, you are hyper alert to the slightest nuance in their body language, their words, the way they look at you. You start to feel dread when they call you, or arrive. They interrupt your sentences, they tell that you are wrong and you don’t know what you’re talking about.
You don’t notice when you stopped having your own opinions. You don’t notice that you are no longer confident. You don’t notice that you can’t remember the last time you followed your own dreams. You don’t notice that you don’t have your own wishes and dreams anymore. You don’t notice that you have become numb to your own needs….
”You have helped me to see that I was drowning and how I had changed so much, while I was in that relationship. I am working with forgiveness and love and compassion for myself. You have helped me see the actions I need to restore my boundaries and feel like I can breathe again. Thank you for seeing me and helping me see myself too.” Charlotte
It can be hard to become aware of, but once you do, it becomes possible to break the destructive cycle and heal.
Here are three absolute truths:
Yes, you can break free of the cycle. The first step is opening your eyes to the narcissistic behaviour
You can’t reason with a narcissist, because from their perspective, they are absolutely right, and everyone else is absolutely wrong. So don’t try to negotiate, reason or appeal to their empathetic side, because they can’t empathise
You can heal, find your voice again, and feel happy, confident and free again
If you would like to book a session with me to help you in your healing journey, to find your own healthy boundaries, to remember who you truly are and to shine your own light in your own sovereign power, please get in touch with me.
”What a breakthrough! Thank you so much! I feel safe with you, because you never judge or criticise - and I’ve had enough of that from my marriage! You helped me see how my childhood experiences led to relationships with narcissists. I already feel like I’ve made great headway and I am booking more sessions with you, because I really deserve to be me!” Sarah